So a few weeks ago I wrote a post on trusting God when things seem impossible. I’ve been encouraged by the feedback I’ve gotten for it. It’s been really good to hear other people share their experiences with me.
In the past few weeks my church did a series entitled The Missing Peace. The series dealt with what is the concept of peace, how to find peace, and being peacemakers. The congregation was also encouraged to send questions via email about these topics. I didn’t submit a question, mainly because I wasn’t quite sure exactly how to phrase what I wanted to ask about knowing when to give up vs when to keep praying and trusting in terms of finding peace; also I was slightly terrified they would use names when asking the question and I didn’t want to risk that. (I know, I have no problems saying this on my blog which is PUBLIC but God forbid people in my church found out! Yes I see the ridiculousness in that as well. I encourage you to laugh at/with me.)
Thanks to the messages in the series and discussion with my small group afterwards, I decided to have a good long talk with God about my life and things I’ve been struggling with. And after I was done, for the first time in a very long time, I felt a peace about things in my life. It’s been a while (or perhaps even never) that I’ve had the sense of peace that’s come over me.
I still have NO IDEA what’s going to happen in my life. I am still going to feel anxious and worry at times. That’s normal and natural. If I didn’t feel like that, then I’m not a human. Struggles WILL happen. But the thing is, this time I feel that God’s given me a sense of direction of what he wants me to do in my life right now. And he’s telling me “You’ve done everything you can. Now give it over me and trust me.” And for the first time ever in this area of my life, I’m finally relinquishing that control and I’m letting him take over.
When I did that, I felt as if a huge weight was lifted off of me. I can’t begin to tell you what a difference that’s made in my life since doing that. Honestly the simple act of giving over my worries and anxieties over to God has made me feel so much lighter and less stressed. I’ve had several friends remark on how I seem a lot better, not stressed out as much, and seem calm compared to where I was a few months ago. What normally would be an antagonizing and emotional time for me, where I withdraw and become angst filled, has instead been a time where I am feeling relatively motivated, happy, and overall peace filled.
God’s been showing me more since I asked him to (doors have been shut and sealed, while others still remain open). Even simple little prayer requests that would have seemed very trivial beforehand, I’m now asking God and they are getting answered. And then I’m seeing him working in other areas, some I didn’t even consider and now I realize it’s all happened because of Him. Just more reassurances of what happens when you trust in Him.
It’s funny how certain parts of our lives we can trust God completely and know that he will take care and provide for us without a doubt. Then there are other parts where we fight and wrestle for control with God because we don’t trust him enough to fulfill and meet those areas of our lives. Even though the obvious answer is that of course God will meet all our needs, it’s just in his time and not ours. Part of our responsibility is to just let go and let him take over. And once you reach that point, it honestly becomes so much better.
When you learn to surrender & let go rather than cling & control..everything falls into place as it should. – The Single Woman
Just an addendum: I’m not going to sugarcoat things and tell you this was an easy choice for me. It’s hard. It may seem like the obvious thing to do, but you have to make the choice to get to this decision and it can take a long time before you realize what you need to do. Just keep praying and trusting and stay strong in your faith. And it’s ok when you have down days and feel like you don’t understand things. You are normal. Take heart.
- “Show me your ways, Lord, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. Remember, Lord, your great mercy and love, for they are from of old. Do not remember the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways; according to your love remember me, for you, Lord, are good.” (Psalm 25:4-7)