Planning. Confirming. Prioritizing.

I like planning.  I like knowing things in advance.  Truth: I like spoilers.

I want to know what’s going to happen and I want to plan in advance.  I’m not really good at open-ended plans.  I need to know, do I need to prepare? How should I prepare? Should I eat dinner in advance? What time do I need to leave to get to the destination?  Should I plan out a block of my time for you?  Basically in my mind, when I plan something, it’s because I am setting aside a block of time for the other person/s because I am showing that they are important and I want to spend time with them without other distractions.

Don’t get me wrong. I can do spur of the moment.  I’m fine with that.  I like doing unexpected things. Surprises that catch you off guard are fun. But it’s when I want to plan something with someone and I get a noncommittal open-ended response that makes me feel like I have no idea what to do. And I don’t want to keep on nagging for a response.  RSVPs drive me INSANE this way.  I invited you because I thought you were important and I wanted you to be there.  If you can’t make it, that’s perfectly fine.  But the non-response drives me nuts because I don’t know whether to plan for you to be there.

Yes, I know we live in a society where everyone is busy and often schedules change so much that we don’t know what tonight will look like much less 3 weeks in advance.  Things happen that cause plans to change.  I get that.   I think the sticking point for me is, priorities.  When you set something as a priority and see something as important, you will do everything you can to make it happen.  And sometimes when I see people being noncommittal with me, it makes me feel like I am not important, especially when I know they will put something or someone else as a high priority.

Are you ok with people who make non-committal plans with you?  How do you deal when you see someone as a priority but then find out that they don’t view you in the same way?  Are you good with confirming?


Speak your mind!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s