“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art…. It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.” – C.S. Lewis
Last week I wrote about what it’s like losing an extremely close friend in your life by their choice and not yours. I was told by several people that I sounded really sad and they wanted to see if I was ok. In all honesty, I am. That post had been written for a while and I had gotten out most of the emotion while writing it and had reached a place where I was at peace to post it. It also got me thinking though even if one person chose not to have me in their life there are still many people who still would welcome me with open arms. That one loss won’t define who I am.
On Sunday, the message at my church was extremely timely as my pastor talked how a passage in Philippians 2 show how “good relationships are built on who you are, not what you can do. Integrity is the glue that holds relationships together.”
He talked about how you need to have several good strong relationships in your life, friends that want you to suceed and will sacrifice things in their own life to help you succeed. This got me thinking that even when I feel that I’ve lost a friendship, I still have other friends who DO care about me and fulfill all those above requirements.
I’ve said before I didn’t have very many close friends growing up when I was in school. Even the ones that I did have, we don’t talk anymore. I don’t know if it’s me or them, but it felt like after we graduated from high school everyone went their separate path, got back together with each other, and I got somehow left behind. I actually have never been invited to a single one of my high school friend’s weddings. Or college for that matter.
Don’t start pity partying me. In the past few years, I have been blessed with some amazing friendships. I am glad that I have found them now in this stage of life because the person I used to be would not have been mature enough to be friends with these people. These folks have stuck by me through thick and thin. They’ve gotten phone calls, texts, Facebook messages, Gchats…heck I think even written notes from me when I needed their friendship. And in turn, I feel like I’ve been there for them as well.
Our pastor categorized these friendships as Level 5 ones. I would hope that they think of me in that same light. These are the people you trust most. The one you can go to with your joys and struggles and know that they will both rejoice and mourn with you. They are the people who will desire your success about their own and in turn you will feel the same way about them. I sometimes joke (though being partially serious) that if I were to die or something horrible had happened to me, these friends would know in less than a day. Which is very comforting to think about. Especially when right now I’m single.
I need those good strong relationships in my life right now. And I feel that God has put these people in my life for a reason. He’ll take away people who I don’t need in my life right now for a reason as well. You always want those friendships you see on TV or movies where you have the big group of friends who stick together throughout the years Well right now (and I hope this doesn’t change but if it does, so be it) I feel like I have even better friends than that.
This is a rather sappy post. FEEL THE LOVE.